“Kev?”
Kevin raised his head from his math homework, knowing it was Jesse hesitating in the doorway even before he looked. “What's up?”
“Can I ask you something? Without you getting mad at me?”
“If it's that touchy, I won't promise to give you an answer, but I can promise not to get mad about you asking it.” He sat up, an invitation for Jesse to come sit on the bed. His desk rarely got used for homework; sprawling on his bed was both more comfortable and easier than trying to clear enough space.
Jesse stepped around the not-yet-unpacked boxes, and perched on the edge of the bed, running a hand over the silky blankets. “It's about this stuff. It's not... natural, is it?”
Kevin winced inside, old fears rousing. He ignored them resolutely. “That depends on what you mean by natural,” he said, choosing his words carefully. “But if you mean did we buy it somewhere that made it by conventional industrial means, then no, it isn't.”
“Then what is it?”
“Most people call it magesilk. Because only a mage can make it, and the parallel has been drawn before of a spider spinning silk. Besides, it generally turns out feeling a lot like silk.”
“You made all this.”
“Lori and I did, yes. In a sense, it's more natural than anything you could buy. Woven out of sunlight or moonlight, purely with a mage's gifts.”
“Out of light? But light's not...” He stopped short.
Kevin smiled, despite the effort to keep his voice steady and his body relaxed. “Light's not supposed to make gates that cover forty minutes' walk in a few steps, either. That's what a mage works with, light and fire. Witches like Cynthia and Naomi and Nick, they can do a little with all the elements. Mages can do a lot more, but only with our element.” He got up, and moved to one window-seat. There was plenty of electric light in the room, of course, but sunlight and moonlight were always easiest to work with. “The moon's bright enough. Come here.”
Jesse came. Absently, Kevin glanced at the lamp by the bed and turned it off, then flipped the switch near the door that controlled the overhead, so the only light was that of the waning moon and stars—not enough to allow him to see, but he didn't really need to be able to. It was one of the first skills he'd mastered under Tomas, how to catch the light in his hands so it pooled like water, then use hands and will to weave the delicate strands of pale moonlight into a piece of whisper-light magesilk a foot square. Jesse's fascination tickled against the edges of his mind. Kevin offered it to him.
“See? That's too flimsy to last long, I didn't put much effort into it. Or I can make it dark.” He ran a finger over the silk in Jesse's hands, turned it black. “I could change the shape, or make it heavier, or make the colour anything I choose. Because it's my will influencing the light. And when it's not needed anymore...” He passed a hand lightly over the cloth, and it melted back into moonlight.
“It only comes from a mage?”
“As far as I know, yes. Why?” He glanced in the direction of the lamp, and it switched itself back on, followed promptly by the overhead light. Poor night-vision was just part of life for an elf, but he wanted to be able to actually see Jesse's reactions. Missing subtle body language, important in anyone but especially in a werewolf, could have big bad consequences.
Jesse shrugged. “Nothing. It's just... I'm sure I've seen Shaine sell scarves and stuff that feel the same, when we're really low on cash. I've asked him a couple of times where they came from, but he won't give me a straight answer.”
“Shaine's no mage,” Kevin said. “A mage living in the city is more likely than a healer or a witch, but Shaine isn't one.”
Jesse blinked. “And you know this how?”
Oops...
“Um, well, I gated to the city to chase off something nasty that could sense you'd been in Haven and was attracted to that?”
“Uh-huh. And this happened when?”
“Way back in November.”
“Back in... that freaky night I had, when I just couldn't lose that guy?”
“Mmhmm. Flynn had a hunch, got a focus, and I gated.” He hated leaving out the part of the wolves in it, but that would lead to longer explanations he wasn't quite comfortable getting into. “At the time, I didn't think hanging around to say hi was a good idea.”
“Probably just as well, I was less used to weirdness. Thank you forever, I was getting really scared.”
“That was what it intended. I did get a look at Shaine, and he shows as perfectly ordinary ungifted to mage-sight. Jess... we didn't think you'd mind the magesilk. Lori and I make things for friends, all the time. That's one of my favourite parts of being a mage. If I'd thought you'd mind...”
Jesse shook his head, slowly. “That's not it. I'm just... trying to figure things out.”
“You're always welcome to ask.”
“I don't think I know the right questions.”
“Not about everything, true. Some things it's better to find out in your own time.”
“Would you tell me if I asked you to?”
“I don't know. I'll tell you anything you want about mages, but most other things I'd be more likely to send you to one of the others to ask. Like Cynthia for witches, or Flynn for seeing. Just like they'd send you to me if you asked about mage stuff.”
“That makes sense. Why do mages only work with light? What about the other three elements? Is there something like mages for them too?”
Jess had been picking up magic theory, hm? “There is for earth, healers like Gisela. Wind and water, none we know of. As for why we're limited to fire...” He hesitated. Should he tell Jesse that not all of Haven was human? Even if he told of only one of three? Or should he let it slide? “Mages aren't human, exactly.”
Jesse gave him a wary look, but didn't react in any of the myriad panicky ways he could have. “Not human?”
“Someday I'll learn to keep my mouth shut.” It felt like walking a knife-edge, one where he didn't know what lay on either side. “'Human' is a rather tricky word to define, but we aren't, quite. Or maybe it would be better to think of us as a human subspecies. Although most of the stories about us are, uh, highly exaggerated.” Pure nonsense. “The name we use, currently, is elves. Any elf can do a few things. There aren't many mages, although it does tend to run in my dad's family. Elves have a natural affinity for fire and light, although a few other things, like telekinesis and telepathy, tend to go with it to varying degrees. And a high metabolism, that's why I eat so much. Mages are even worse than other elves for that. Elves also have no night-sight to speak of, but we can see heat patterns—infrared, basically. And mages have something called mage-sight that lets us see anything that's living or magical.”
“Elves.”
“Well... like I said, the stories are warped seriously. Elves are always light-skinned and blonde and usually average height or above, and there's no such thing as an overweight elf—unhealthily skinny elves, yes. You going to try to tell me you didn't even notice how Lori and I and most of the other tall blondes you might've seen in Haven look?”
It took all his self-control to be still and wait for Jesse's reaction. He was so deathly afraid of being mistrusted and feared, he'd had enough of that for a lifetime. Even if he'd brought it on himself.
And if Jesse stopped trusting him?
That he couldn't do anything about except hope.
Jesse sighed, expression one of resignation. “I should've expected something weird like this, after what I've seen. I've definitely been hanging around here too long. The urge to do something drastic and hysterical isn't even very strong.”
Something inside released. Truth rang below the words, and Kevin could pick up nothing on the surface suggesting deception. Jesse really saw nothing to fear.
Kevin had to fight a sudden urge to hug him. “That's good. My coven would be less than impressed with me if you did that.”
“Weren't supposed to tell?”
“Not exactly, it's only... it's a risk, on our part. Most of what keeps Haven safe is that we make sure we aren't noticed.”
Jesse snorted derisively. “Not much risk. Who'd believe me? I'm not exactly a reliable source. Elves and witches and healers... yeah, right, like anyone would listen to me. So. Are healers exactly human? Or is there something for earth?”
“We call them dryads. The stories about them are just as messed up. However, if you want to know more about dryads, you can go find Deanna or Gisela and ask.” He just hoped neither would be mad that he'd told. Although given Gisela's oft-repeated opinion that they should just tell Jess all about Haven, she at least would probably be delighted. “Dryads are a bit harder to spot, but think in terms of shades of brown, usually darker rather than lighter, and about two-thirds of them are female. There are human healers, though, and not all dryads are healers. And like I said, water and air, there's nothing we know of. Witches are human and work with all four elements, although they usually have tendencies towards one. Elves and dryads can both interbreed with humans, but not with each other, which is part of why no one's figured out precise definitions yet.”
“Elves and dryads and witches... lord, what a place. Anyway. You have homework to do. Thank you for the honest answer, I'm going to go rethink my view of the world. Again.”
“All right. We didn't know what to get, by way of music, you're welcome to borrow anything of mine you want.”
“What, Flynn's cards couldn't tell him? Maybe later. Good luck with the homework.”
“I need it.”
Jess departed, but he left Kevin feeling like a hypocrite. Lying by omission, not telling him about wolves, was still lying. The three covens and their friends had discussed it, and decided Jesse deserved answers when he started really asking questions, but disagreement remained about how far to go and what to let him discover himself.
It will be so nice when all this is over, he thought wistfully. When Jess knows what he is, and there are no more secrets. I really don't like secrets. Maybe soon.